Why I Changed My Word for 2015 #oneword365

Words

I was all set to start the new year with my #oneword365. It was carefully chosen and for a while, I was convinced it was the right one. It’s a really great word. And, I was really hoping it would help me make this next year better. Last year was so hard. I fought with emotional pain and physical exhaustion like I was thrown into the boxing ring for the fight of my life. I feel like I spent a lot of time standing in the corner, shellshocked, confused, weary, waiting, trying to figure out my next move. So, this word, it’s such a great word. It felt like putting on a pair of really great boxing gloves.  

Intentional

I tried it on for a while. It made me feel strong and able to change myself and the things around me. And, oh, how I longed for change. How I wanted to be different. You could call it a lifelong dream. I’ve talked about how I used to try to reinvent myself as a young girl. I still do that. With this word, I was going to improve as much as I possibly could.

The  more I carried this word around, the more I realized I wasn’t ready for it. It can’t be the prominent thread  in the fabric of this year. It’s not that I don’t want to be intentional. I do. I want to be intentional with writing, relationships, faith, self-care, love. 

I realized though that asking my burned out, burdened down heart to focus big on being intentional was a lot like supporting my insecurity driven need to change myself. 

I’m not ready to focus on the word “intentional”. Not yet. It can be a minor player this year. But, not the main focus.

There is a step I’ve skipped over all my life. One word that needs to precede everything else.

Acceptance

Accepting myself, my quirky, awkward ways, my gifts and strengths, my weaknesses and fears. Accepting my life, being a housewife and mom of 7 kids (even if it’s incredibly hard), accepting my limits and boundaries, accepting my children, my husband and their limits, boundaries, strengths and weaknesses. Accepting the ebb and flow of friendships past and present in and out of my life. Accepting my faith journey as my own, even if it’s different and full of questions. Accepting burnout. Accepting my exhaustion because it has become an awakening to myself, my needs, my identity. Accepting that our family deals with cavities, low grades, anxiety, asthma, depression, pain, strong personalities, behaviours. Accepting the shape of my heart and the shape of my hips.

I think acceptance will become a gateway. 

A gateway to love, peace, fullness, aliveness, hope, dreams, rest, healing.

My one word for the year needed to change so that I could finally stop trying to change. Words are powerful and I love them so. I hope you’ll join me in choosing one word for the year. #oneword365

What’s your word?

Photo Credit:
<a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/11363525@N02/3786683541/”>[Olivia]</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>cc</a>

  • Ron-Tammy Swanson

    Beautifully written!! Happy New Year Julie-Anne!!

    • http://www.julieannemauno.com Julie-Anne Mauno

      Thanks Tammy! Happy New Year to you and your family as well! :)

  • http://dilectusmeusmihi.blogspot.com/ Mikaela D’Eigh

    Reading this was freeing ~ I always feel chained to the word I choose for the year. Your writing style is lovely: open, honest, and helpful. This is my first visit to your blog and I look forward to reading more about your journey.

    May 2015 bring you joy, peace, and acceptance. ;-)

    • http://www.julieannemauno.com Julie-Anne Mauno

      Thank you Mikaela. I’m so blessed by your comment! Thanks for your encouragement :)

  • http://www.annepeterson.com/ Anne Peterson

    Julie Anne,
    Want to know what I appreciate besides how you commanded the words to get in place so we could know your thoughts? I appreciate that you were open enough to change your word instead of white-knuckling it through 364 more days. I think acceptance is a wonderful choice. May 2015 give you plenty of opportunities to practice and I love that you are on that list as well.

    • http://www.julieannemauno.com Julie-Anne Mauno

      Ann, what can I say but thank you for your generous words! I’m so glad I won’t be white-knuckling it through the rest of the year too!

  • Olivia Timmons

    This is perfect!! Acceptance is my word of the year as well and reading this makes me even more confident in my choice. Thank you so much and I can not wait to read more from you!! :)

    God bless!